I made a new twitter account because why not. Follow me and I’ll follow back once I’m off work. ♡
(via devoids)216,626 notes
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This is my favorite thing of all the things
You are just NOT allowed to judge the way that Mamoru looks until you see him after a shower
'cause then it's when he transforms in supersexyfuckingorgeousman
(via fuckyeahprettysoldier)1,018 notes
*whispers* You can be mature and respectful and still have a dirty sense of humour.
*murmurs* You can curse a lot and still be highly intelligent with a massive vocabulary.
And God said unto Abraham, “Abraham.”
And Abraham replied, “What.”
God said to John, “Come forth and receive eternal life.” But John came fifth and won a toaster.
And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, “The one whom I kiss is the one you seek.”
To which they responded, “Gay.”
And thus, god made Eve. And she was bammin’ slammin’ bootylicious.
see you all in hell
oh my god
YES TO ALL OF THESE PLS
can i be paul mccartney’s personal hair fluffer?!?!?!?
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